It starts at home.

1 young boy, age 6 after hearing a Bible story read by his mother, decides to ask Jesus into his heart. He prays a prayer, truly desiring to be obedient. This makes his Mommy and Daddy happy. He is baptized soon after, and the whole church celebrates. He lives a life in church, Sunday school, every service listening to the stories, sermons and hymns, memorizing God's Word, and doing all the right things. Years pass by, he goes to Christian schools, is involved in community events, attends revival services, and serves in many church ministries.
In his teen years, he works with the youth group in the church, bringing friends in and telling them of the love of Jesus and how to get to heaven. This young man is considered by all to be a good Christian testimony. We all want to have a child like this, don't we? We all hope that our stories and church activities will produce Christian children. It is our desire to bring about salvation in our teaching, training, and bring forth fruit for God in our own homes. This is what God wants for us, right? We will come back to this young man, but let's look at another child.

1 young boy, age 12. After living in a home, like most, with struggles, parental conflict, and what he sees as a difficult family life, he is driven into deep depression and seclusion. He has never been accepted because of how his family lives. He is not a loner, exactly, but he has only one real friend, or so he thinks.
This friend is involved with sexual sin and drugs at the age of 12, and shows him pornographic magazines. He disregards the conscience inside telling him that this is wrong. Something about this seems appealing, and he feels like he is more of a man for being able to have such carnal knowledge. He has no idea that this sin, these images will shape his future for years to come. Sin has its consequence, and even hidden sin becomes obvious in time.
He delves deeper into sexual sin, perversion, but his perception is that nobody knows or even cares to ask what is troubling him. Years later, at the age of 16, he begins to party with older friends and finds himself drinking daily to continue to try to block out that still small voice in the back of his mind.
A drinking party one night gets out of hand and he drives drunk down a curvy road, somehow escaping hitting trees and rocks. The night ends with this young man crouched by the road side throwing stones at vehicles as they drive by. Scared, our young boy is drunk, shaking in the woods, and digging deeper into the pit of sin by the moment it would seem.
By 18, he is involved in more and more sexual perversion, not realizing that he is unable to have real, healthy relationships with the opposite sex because of the sin of his heart and adulterous thoughts that engulf his mind.
The friends he hangs around with get him some drugs, just another part of being a cool mature man. He finds himself stealing from his family, his boss, and breaking into homes to get the money he "needs" to get the drugs that will soothe the pain.
By 19, he has been in and out of jail a few times, usually related to alcohol or drugs. A close friend dies in an alcohol related drowning. This death, and those of other young friends makes him think of settling down. He gets married.
By the ripe old age of 21,he has been married, divorced, and feels completely alone. His own family has turned their backs on him, and for good reason. He reaches out through sex, drugs, alcohol, anything he can to stop the pain. He spends years looking to find what will make life worth living. Who will reach him and tell him about Jesus?
His young son is the only thing that seems worth living for, yet he continues on, never realizing that the Savior was there waiting for him to reach out and see that his way will not do. This young man seems to have no hope.

Do you know a young man like this one? Nobody here wants to admit that this could be someone they know or associate with, yet I can say without a doubt that you know someone like that.
The first young man was never saved, just going through the motions, but felt safe knowing that Mommy and Daddy have reassured him of his eternal home in heaven. He wanted to be loved and accepted, but did not rely on God, repent of his sin, or understand what he needed to do. He knew the right words and the things to do, but was never challenged to make it real, to learn more, to make a commitment. If those challenges had been made, maybe he would have realized earlier in life that there was more than a prayer, more than good deeds, and more than “church life”, but a restored relationship with the God that made him that he needed.

The second young man was obviously not saved. He rebelled against all authority, and boldly, though secretly lived a life denying God. He thinks he should live it up while he is alive and all the talk of God and hell will wait until he is old and too tired to have any more fun. He is scared, and doesn’t feel like he deserves to be rescued. He will get right with God someday, maybe, but not today.

I know these stories well. I have seen it played out time and again in homes and churches wherever I go. It doesn’t have to be this way, and we must not allow this to happen in our homes and in our churches. You may ask why I am so passionate about this. There are a few reasons. First, the Lord has laid this message on my heart and I knew I must share it. Secondly, I am passionate because I have children that I don’t want to take either of these courses. I want them to know the Lord of the Bible, to know God for who He is, and make sure they have the information necessary to make a decision to follow Him. God’s way, the only way!

You see, these two young men are one and the same. He is me. Some may be surprised, others have assumed things about me, and many of my actions in this life I am ashamed of. I can honestly say that the only reason I can stand before you today and speak is because God has radically transformed my life. I came to Him, repenting of my sin, acknowledging my inability to gain righteousness of my own accord. I had to stop pretending, stop searching for my own answers, and face the truth that was staring me in the face.

God made me, I was accountable to Him whether I wanted to submit to His authority or not. It would not be enough to go through the motions some more, or please my parents by going to the altar at church. I needed to surrender ALL of me to Him. I needed to recognize God’s love in sending His son, Jesus to die in my place. He is worthy of my praise, my worship, and my meager attempts to gain His acceptance will not do. I need a Savior. We all do. I am blessed to know that “whosoever will may come” and that God does not wish that any should perish, even dirty, rotten sinners like me.

You may not have such a hard tale of woe and sin, but Romans 3 reminds us that there is none righteous, not even one. The scale of the sin is not what made me need a Savior. The fact of sin, no matter how seemingly trivial, is what caused Jesus to have to die for me. We cannot earn it, buy it, or attain it any way but His way. Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. NO ONE comes to the Father, but by me” Jesus is the only way, and for what seems like the first time in my life, I chose the right way. We need to make sure our children know the true way, not watering it down, not compromising, but the truth from God’s Word.

We would like to think that we can make the decision to follow the Lord for our children. We can’t , that decision could not be made for me, no matter how hard my parents tried, they could not make me repent before God. Parents can only live their lives in a way that is honoring and pleasing to the Lord, teaching, instructing and modeling Godly behavior. God has to take over from there and draw the child to Himself. No one seeks after God, not one can come unless the Spirit draws him.

If we are the best parents before God, there still may be some that do not choose Him, but the percentages certainly seem to drop among families with strong fathers that lead according to God’s ways, not bending the Scripture around their own personal thoughts or desires. We must not pervert God’s Word to please ourselves.

Romans 5:6-11 6For while we were still helpless, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly.
7For one will hardly die for a righteous man; though perhaps for the good man someone would dare even to die. 8But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.
9Much more then, having now been justified by His blood, we shall be saved from the wrath of God through Him. 10For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son, much more, having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life. 11And not only this, but we also exult in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received the reconciliation

I desired to write today about the importance of not only spending time in church, or reading Bible stories to your kids, but to live a life worthy of the name of Christ. To dedicate ourselves to our Savior. One part of that is to make sure that we teach a true gospel, not one of works or halfheartedness, but one of total dedication, recognizing that we have no righteousness in and of ourselves.

A mediocre effort, simply going with the flow and never challenging ourselves will never accomplish what God wants us to be. We must hold ourselves accountable to God’s standards. We can not be satisfied to be better than most Christians, or closer to God’s will than other churches. We must be in the center of God’s will and never be satisfied until we get there. I can tell you that until we are in heaven, there is room for improvement. Even David, a man after God’s own heart, sinned. He struggled, and God never left him without the strength to defeat sin.

Those close to us must love us enough to ask difficult questions and lovingly show us when we are living in sin. We cannot be lukewarm. We know how God feels about living that way regarding Him.

Revelation 3:15-20 15'I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot; I wish that you were cold or hot.
16'So because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of My mouth.
17'Because you say, "I am rich, and have become wealthy, and have need of nothing," and you do not know that you are wretched and miserable and poor and blind and naked,
18I advise you to buy from Me gold refined by fire so that you may become rich, and white garments so that you may clothe yourself, and that the shame of your nakedness will not be revealed; and eye salve to anoint your eyes so that you may see.
19 Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline; therefore be zealous and repent.
20'Behold, I stand at the door and knock; if anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and will dine with him, and he with Me

This passage tells us that God would rather we be cold or hot. God’s church, His testimony before men is damaged, along with opportunity to reach the lost by mediocre Christians that just fill the pews, and are comfortable right where they are.

May we never consider ourselves to have attained just the right level of spirituality and Godliness. Verse 19 tells us that who the Lord loves, he disciplines; therefore we should repent. Verse 20 is not a verse about salvation with God standing at our heart’s door hoping to come in, but the lukewarm church who has shut God out. They appear to be His church, but do not do the things that please Him.

I am not saying this is your church, although we all do need to be on our guard that we never become like this church in Revelation, callous to our sin, avoiding discipline and correction in the home or the assembly. Discipline may be the gentle reminder of a friend, a word that God gives the teacher, or a host of other things. It must be the truth given in love and according to God’s way, as outlined in Scripture.
We are family, we should be looking to help and encourage those who need it. That may be me some days, and it may be you some days. We must be on our guard that it is not us, and that we don’t allow easy believe-ism and “as good as can be expected” to be the characteristics of ourselves and our assembly. We all have a part in this, and we need to do our part to keep God’s assembly honoring to Him.

Romans 12:1-2 1Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship.
2And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.

It is not enough to just do good works, but to give ourselves as a living sacrifice. Our lives are for God’s honor and glory. We are to be crucified with Christ, not just living freely because our sin is forgiven. Romans 6 expands on that, but that is another topic.

Do you walk the talk? Do you live your life in a way that shows your spouse, children, coworkers, friends, and loved ones that you are completely sold out for God? Would those people, if asked, say that you are living every minute of every day striving to be more like our Savior?
Would God, who knows our deeds and our hearts, say that we are on fire for Him, cold, or lukewarm, “having a form of godliness, but lacking the power thereof”?

I was 25 years old before I came to the point of not only head knowledge of God and sin, Jesus and salvation, but a repentant spirit yearning to be made right before a Holy God.
Psalm 51"16-17 For You do not delight in sacrifice, otherwise I would give it; You are not pleased with burnt offering. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; A broken and a contrite heart, O God, You will not despise

God desires us to come before Him with a broken and contrite heart. I was certainly broken that day hearing a familiar gospel song. I started weeping so much while driving that I had to pull over. Nathaniel, only 4 years old, asked me what was wrong. I couldn’t say a word. I was finally ready to surrender and I am so glad I did. We must remind ourselves that God is the potter, and we are the clay. Let Him mold us to what he desires for us to be.

I knew what I needed to do as the years went on, but I hardened my heart, not wanting to surrender to God. I played the part, and led a secret life that I have seen played out by one or more teens in every youth group I have interacted with, which are many. So, how do we keep it from getting this way? What can we do to show our kids that there is more than Sunday services and religion?

Titus 2:1-8 1But as for you, speak the things which are fitting for sound doctrine.
2Older men are to be temperate, dignified, sensible, sound in faith, in love, in perseverance.
3Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, 4so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children,
5to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.
6Likewise urge the young men to be sensible;
7in all things show yourself to be an example of good deeds, with purity in doctrine, dignified,
8sound in speech which is beyond reproach, so that the opponent will be put to shame, having nothing bad to say about us.

Here is our example. Men, women, young folks, are all instructed here as to how we should live. I will concentrate on the men for now, though. As the God appointed leaders of our homes, we are the authority. But that is not just being boss. No, with authority comes responsibility. Husbands, you are to be leading your household. You are to be the man you should be before God, and model that for your wife and your children. Our model should be one of love and desire to help the whole family to glorify God together. This is a great responsibility and one that I admit that at times I feel I don’t measure up to. If I don’t lead in God’s ways, then there will be no one following. I can’t expect them to learn it on their own. Some may, but most won’t.

If you disregard the daily reading of God's Word, your family will hold no regard for it either. If you do not spend time in prayer, they will not see the value of it in your life. They will see it as a tradition, a religious exercise and nothing more. If the Lord’s Day is just another day off, to play and we do not dedicate it to the Lord, we can rest assured that the next generation will become lax about it, too.

If you spend more time in front of a TV than showing your family the life of a man that seeks after God, you will breed the same attitude in your children and your wife. Working out at the gym, sports, hobbies, leisure time, and many other things may have their place in your life, but if God is not first, you will be held accountable before God.

I don’t want to stand on Judgement Day with God shaking His head, disappointed in how I lived. We need to live out our love for God. So, is this scriptural, you may ask?

Matthew 22:36-40 the Pharisees are trying to catch Jesus doing or saying something wrong, we pick up in verse 36"Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?"
37And He said to him, " 'YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND.'
38"This is the great and foremost commandment.
39"The second is like it, 'YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.'
40 On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets

Loving God is the greatest commandment. That includes loving our neighbor as ourselves. Jesus said that this sums up the Law and the Prophets. If we love God, we will obey Him, loving our neighbors also.
I would love to follow that verse out, but I will stick to the idea that God is to be first, with no exceptions. Our lives are for God, we were created for His glory. We have died to ourselves, and taken up His cross and followed. There is no room for mediocrity. We have covered what we are to live for, but what does this look like in regards to our families.

Psalm 127:3-5 3Behold, children are a gift of the LORD, The fruit of the womb is a reward. 4Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one's youth. 5How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them

If children are a blessing, a heritage from God, then we are accountable before God to raise them up right.
Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go, Even when he is old he will not depart from it

Train a child. Take a proactive approach. Teach them what they need to know. Don't wait until they fall into sin and turn their backs on God. Start young and be faithful, teaching and instructing them who God is, what He desires from us, and what the consequences of disobedience are.

How do we go about training them?
Joshua 1:8 This book of the law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it; for then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have success.

Deut 11:16-20 Beware that your hearts are not deceived, and that you do not turn away and serve other gods and worship them. 17"Or the anger of the LORD will be kindled against you, and He will shut up the heavens so that there will be no rain and the ground will not yield its fruit; and you will perish quickly from the good land which the LORD is giving you.
18"You shall therefore impress these words of mine on your heart and on your soul; and you shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontals on your forehead.

19"You shall teach them to your sons, talking of them when you sit in your house and when you walk along the road and when you lie down and when you rise up.
20"You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates,
21so that your days and the days of your sons may be multiplied on the land which the LORD swore to your fathers to give them, as long as the heavens remain above the earth

Job 23:10-12 But He knows the way I take; When He has tried me, I shall come forth as gold. 11"My foot has held fast to His path; I have kept His way and not turned aside. 12"I have not departed from the command of His lips; I have treasured the words of His mouth more than my necessary food.

Job knew that he had followed God, and that God would not forsake him. He considered God's Word more precious than food. I don't want to add to God's Word, but would like to make an application point here. Do you desire God's Word more than food, sleep, money, fishing, sports, the acclaim of man? What in your life is more important to you than God? If there is anything, you need to confess that to Him and fix it today. There is no time to waste. It all belongs to the Lord and we must not allow anything that is displeasing to Him to continue to have a place in our lives. The fleshly desires sometimes become great, and we can fall if we do not rely on God to lift us up in those times of trouble.

How do we combat the desire to live for the flesh?
Galatians 5:16-17 But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not carry out the desire of the flesh.
17For the flesh sets its desire against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, so that you may not do the things that you please. 18But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the Law.
19Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, which are: immorality, impurity, sensuality, 20idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions,
21envying, drunkenness, carousing, and things like these, of which I forewarn you, just as I have forewarned you, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.
22But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,
23gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.
24Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.
25If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit

These verses tell us that if we live by the spirit, we will not fulfill the lust of the flesh. It also gives us some milestones, fruits to look for in our own lives. We should be striving to exhibit these fruits. If we follow the Spirit, we will see the fruit in our own lives and be used of God in His work.

James 1:13-25 13Let no one say when he is tempted, "I am being tempted by God"; for God cannot be tempted by evil, and He Himself does not tempt anyone. 14But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust. 15Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death. 16Do not be deceived, my beloved brethren.
17Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow. 18In the exercise of His will He brought us forth by the word of truth, so that we would be a kind of first fruits among His creatures. 19This you know, my beloved brethren But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger; 20for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God. 21Therefore, putting aside all filthiness and all that remains of wickedness, in humility receive the word implanted, which is able to save your souls. 22But prove yourselves doers of the word, and not merely hearers who delude themselves. 23For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks at his natural face in a mirror; 24for once he has looked at himself and gone away, he has immediately forgotten what kind of person he was.

25But one who looks intently at the perfect law, the law of liberty, and abides by it, not having become a forgetful hearer but an effectual doer, this man will be blessed in what he does.

This passage reminds us that we cannot just hear the word, but must put it into practice. We must not disregard the truth of God’s Word, but let it transform us into what He desires us to be. Justin likes to remind me that sarcasm is not a fruit of the Spirit
Verse 19-20 speaks of anger. This is also not a fruit of the Spirit. We have no business being angry and terrorizing each other under the guise of godly counsel. Another subject I will not be getting into today.

Verses 22-24 remind us that we have crucified the flesh if we are indeed children of God. We do not have to follow the sinful nature anymore. The thing is, it should never get to that point. If we look into the “perfect law of liberty” we will be convicted by God, His Spirit ministering to us, drawing us back to Him. It is only when we disregard God in our hearts that we will be trapped in sin. We need never get this way.

James 4:4-8 You adulteresses, do you not know that friendship with the world is hostility toward God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God. 5Or do you think that the Scripture speaks to no purpose: "He jealously desires the Spirit which He has made to dwell in us"?
6But He gives a greater grace Therefore it says, "GOD IS OPPOSED TO THE PROUD, BUT GIVES GRACE TO THE HUMBLE." 7Submit therefore to God Resist the devil and he will flee from you. 8Draw near to God and He will draw near to you Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded

Here is a stern warning not to be complacent, letting sin into our lives. We all think that we are not like the world, but we need to honestly and prayerfully assess everything we do to make sure it is of God , not of the world.
God warns us that to be friends with the world is to be an enemy of God. This is no place for any Christian to be. We sometimes catch ourselves flirting with sin, teetering on the edge of the cliff, but we need not run on the edge. We should not be looking over the cliff, or admiring the flowers on the edge of the cliff but living on the narrow path that God has told us to stay on.
Matthew 7:13-14 Enter through the narrow gate; for the gate is wide and the way is broad that leads to destruction, and there are many who enter through it. 14"For the gate is small and the way is narrow that leads to life, and there are few who find it.
This warns that the way to life is narrow, and not many find it. I know I have found myself too close to the edge more than once, fallen and broken fellowship with God. It is not for us to desire for ourselves, but to desire what God wants more than anything.

I want to urge every parent here to live like God would have you live. The fruits of the Spirit should be easily evidenced in a person honestly seeking to please the Lord. To be the man, woman, child, husband, wife, father, mother, and servant of God that we should be. Leading by example is much more profitable than making excuses for our mistakes, hoping our children will learn from our sin and disobedience.

I have focused on the fathers mostly, I know. As a father, I know this has hit home with me and that is why I am sharing it with you all. This is not just about parenting, though, but for all of us. I hope I effectively communicated that and that this is profitable for all of us. I know in preparing this talk, God shook me pretty hard and I found my own writing to be convicting. Funny how that happens, huh?

Older folks, grandparents, elders, you need to be in prayer and seeking God’s face in how to be involved in helping shape the lives of the young families in this body. Your years of experience and patience in guiding from God's Word are valued. Keep us in your prayers, and be involved in your families, both genetic and spiritual. Some may mentor, some may pray, but you are all important in His body. God has put us all here together for a reason. We are a family, brought together by the Lord, and you are all equally vital to His work.

Young people, guard your hearts against sin. Honor your parents, and seek to honor God in all you do. Don't be satisfied with just going to church, but dig deep into God's Word. Ask your parents and other spiritual folks to help you understand difficult passages. There are many here willing and ready to help if you just ask. I did not have the resources growing up that we have here in this building.

Realize that your are not born Christian. You have to make a conscious decision as God leads you. God will never leave you, nor forsake you. It is up to you to follow Him. I can tell you that even though sin seems fun for a season, the ends of it are the ways of death. You may not get the second chance that I got, not everybody does.
The tattoo on my arm (which I am not advocating, but it is one of the scars I bear to this day) bears the constant reminder of a young life lost. An 18 year old boy that, though he was a popular, fun, nice guy, was not born again and is in hell for eternity. He died rescuing a drunk man from drowning. That drunk man lived, and my friend died. He had no idea that night would be his last on this earth. He was not prepared, and I lived with the guilt for years of not telling him.
Some live a long life, some are gone as teens. Don’t wait until tomorrow to speak about the need for salvation to those you care about. You may never get the chance. I am not trying to scare anyone, but life is precious and we only get one chance. Make it count for God. You have the choice to make it eternally right or eternally wrong. Choose wisely.

Lastly, I just want to thank you all for listening. I do not speak today as someone who has attained anything, but one who desires to learn, to be held accountable according to God's Word, and to encourage those who may be struggling that we are all in this together. We are in this together, this is God’s church, Christ’s body.

We're back

OK, I just wanted to let folks know that we are back from Ohio. We had a great trip, lots to talk about. First, though, I wanted to share the message that I will be preaching this weekend at chapel. The Lord laid it on my heart a while ago, and I didn't know the timing until recently, but now is the time. I will post it on the next blog, it is long, and I welcome questions. If you would like to share this with anyone, feel free. If you would like to hear more of my testimony, let me know. I would love to come and speak wherever God wants me. Be patient, there is a lot going on right now, God is at work(always) and I will explain what I can when I can.

Bear with me where the text of the sermon is geared towards a specific audience. I believe most churches in this nation need to hear it. Pass it on, challenge each other. Seek God to see what you may need to change in your own life. I know I have had to do that in the preparation of this message. May God richly bless as you continue to follow Him.

Mark