Recently, after multiple conversations with few friends, we got on the subject of men's roles and responsibilities, leaders of the church, and lots of other subjects that are of great interest to me. We talked quite a bit about what God expects from us and how we should live our lives according to His Word. We also realized that we, as a group, seemed to be thirsting for men to get together with and help each other, being encouraged and accountable to each other and even more to God.
So, it is with this interest that this past Friday evening three of us got together and discussed what we wanted to study, what areas we need to work on, and how to keep each other accountable. While I won't go into what we said personally, I do think that in all the groups I have seen before where men get together to study and pray, that it has been done poorly on most occasions.
I have seen lots of "prayer groups" that turn into social clubs and "men's breakfasts" that are used mostly to get men of the church to show up for work days. This is a sad state of affairs when we use something like the opportunity of men to get together and talk honestly about God's expectations of us and we end up checking the clock every 2 minutes to see if we can make an excuse to get out the door.
As men following after God, husbands, fathers, sons, brothers, friends, teachers, and all the other roles we have to live out in our daily lives, we have a lot of responsibility. I would like to outline a few things here that we identified as duties of a man. Now, we are all married with children, home educating our children, and work for ourselves, so we have many of the same issues to deal with and some are different for others.
Husbands-We are told by God to love our wives, lead our homes, to be the leader of our family spiritual matters-all too often this is left to the ladies. This is a shame.
Father- We are to love our children, teach them the ways of the Lord and protect them from the influences of the world.
Sons- any of us men are indeed sons to someone We are to honor our parents also, some may need to help pay bills, care for a sick parent, or maybe take care of them full time. It is not the governments job to care for our families, it is ours.
Brothers- in Christ, we are all family. We need to help each other be accountable, to encourage each other, to do the work of the Lord, to evangelize and tell others about Christ. As brothers, we have the ability to bring each other up or tear each other down. This is something we need to be very careful with. We want to bring those who are not walking with God like they should in love as the Scripture says, back into fellowship. Sometimes this is one on the hardest parts for me. In order to be able to come to a brother who is in fault with advice from the Word of God, I should be following it also. We are only hurting ourselves when we walk away from the precepts set forth for us in God's Word. In love, and with Scripture(not our own ideas) we should come along side an erring brother and help him back into fellowship.
Teachers-as we become closer to the Lord and walk in the light of His Word, we are also given the responsibility and privilege to share what God shows us with others. This may be through a devotional at prayer meeting, teaching on Sunday morning, or leading a Bible study with other men. As we grow together, we are able to reach more people for God. When we are steady in our walk and searching God's will out, He will show us where to turn next. Some of us may be full time missionaries, some travel and teach, some witness to folks at work, the grocery store, and wherever we go.
We talked the other night about our first and foremost responsibilities and what they were. We couldn't nail down just one, but we decided that a man who does not first reach his own wife and children first for Jesus is going to fail in other areas. God gave us wives and children and we are responsible for them for this life. In eternity, we will be held accountable for this life, and as husbands and fathers, how silly it would be for us to go out preaching to everyone and neglect those who live in our homes. Our family is truly our first mission field. Let's make sure we get our home life straight first before we go out. Charles Spurgeon said once "If any man's life at home is unworthy, he should go several miles away before he stand up to preach. When he stands up, he should say nothing." That seems to make the same point. We would seem silly, if not hypocritical, to show up street preaching or knocking on doors sharing the message of salvation with others while our own wives and children sit at home, headed for hell. What a huge responsibility it is that God has given us!
Men, I want to encourage you, we have a great task ahead, but also a great reward as God's chosen leaders of our families. We need to encourage each other to be strong in the Lord in the hard times, and thankful for this blessing the Lord has chosen to give us.
Through God's grace and mercy
Mark Cowperthwaite
ps. If anyone wants to email me without posting on the comment section for everyone to see, my email is permanently linked on this blog. My address is markcowperthwaite@roadrunner.com
