In our efforts to find help and support for those grieving the loss of a baby, we have found so many resources that we never knew existed. It seems this is not the type of subject people often go public about until they feel a need to help others. In generations past, there was an unwarranted shame associated with losing a child in death. Today, we see that people are much more open about their grief, and look to the community to help them as they walk through the valley. We have been blessed to find some resources, and thought we would share what we have found with others.
We happened upon Rachel's Gift here in McDonough, Georgia, a few months ago. This ministry was started after the founder, Lori Beth Blaney, was in a car accident and lost her daughter, Rachel. In the following years, Lori Beth wanted to help others dealing with a loss, and started what is now known as Rachel's Gift. Sara and I met with Lori Beth and another volunteer last week. They set up the meeting to encourage and help us as we seek to support grieving families in Maine, where we plan to move at the end of January. We were richly blessed by this meeting, getting to hear how God is using the Rachel's Gift volunteers and the resources they have found to bless families as they go through the grieving process.
When our son Joshua died, we were given a memory box at the hospital. It included a weighted bear to help with "empty arms syndrome". We were also given a beautiful little blue box tied with a ribbon. Inside the box was a heart shaped pillow, a blanket, a clipping of Joshua's hair, along with his hand and footprints. These items, along with photos taken by the nursing staff of Joshua's body, were very helpful to us and still are to this day. We still carry that bear around, and though less often, we still look at the pictures and lovingly look through our treasured box of memories. For the record, we highly suggest taking photos of your baby if you are able, as it has been a great help to us.
Rachel's Gift does a similar box, also including the book "Empty cradle, broken heart: Surviving the death of your baby", a memory book, and a stuffed toy. The ladies shared how much each of these items help a family, and they had so much to share that we could not possibly share it all here. We learned so much from this meeting, and we thank God for putting this group of volunteers together to help families in their community in such time of need. The ministry is very busy, as they serve 8 area hospitals not only with grief support but also training for nurses. This free training helps the hospital staff work alongside the family and community, and shares some of the things they can do and say (and NOT do and say) to help a family in those first hours after a loss.
One of the things I have appreciated about Rachel's Gift is their genuine desire to help, without getting any glory for themselves. The website has links to other ministries and individuals who support those enduring a loss. One such link is to MEND (Mothers Enduring Neonatal Death). With personal stories and newsletters targeted to help in special situations, MEND's newsletter can be a great help. You can read the latest newsletter at http://www.mend.org/newsletters/2011nov-dec.pdf
Sorry for going on so long with today's post. We hope you find encouragement through these shared resources, and encourage those who have a passion to help families enduring loss to find a similar ministry in your area where you can help. Thanks for reading, check in often or subscribe to this blog for more information.
